There’s a social force at work in the world today – some may even call it a conspiracy. It’s only subtly present in urban areas, and likely nonexistant in rural ones. It makes brief appearances in suburbia. It is something we must all take a stand against. Our identities, once hidden, are now being stolen from us!
Jake Gyllenhaal and Heath Ledger claim that Brokeback Mountain is not a gay movie – just a love story (that incedentally involves two men). Bullshit! [Pun intended]. We live in a world that accuses gay people of trying to impress the “Homosexual Agenda” upon children. WTF is the homosexual agenda? Nobody told me. I didn’t get a brochure at the latest Pride parade.
So if a movie is released that depicts two men participating in anal intercourse together, it’s a gay movie. End of story. It cannot be argued. Yeah, sure, you can try to wrap it up and present it as foremost, a love story … it’s only coincidental that the primary characters are both male. In fact, I wish that were the case, and that it were that simple … that people didn’t care what the sex of the characters were. But that’s not the case. This is a gay movie.
And just tonight, I’m sitting at Vera’s – a gay coffee shop in south Minneapolis. There are about 20 gay men here and a handful of women. Then in walks a strapping and handsome young man. He is the epitome of sex appeal. Following him in the door is his date – a woman.
At this point I’m angry. I’m mad because he is taking his date here to show her that he’s okay with “the gays”. He’s not one himself, of course, but he’s comfortable with them. In fact, he even dresses like us. He’s also taken up an interest in theatre and literature. He’s dressed well. AND, he knows how to order something other than black coffee at the counter.
I grew up trying to hide the same traits this straight man is so freely exhibiting. I hid them because they weren’t accepted. It’s taken me years to feel comfortable in my own skin, and now the latest generation is taking its lead from us. What gives?
TMM must be stopped. We cannot allow our identities to be stolen from us! Stand up, take a stand. Tell these guys to butch it up! Tell them to spit. Chew tobacco. Drink budweiser. Wear dirty wifebeaters and Lee jeans. Drive jacked-up trucks. Watch football. Whistle at hot women. These are the qualities that make this country’s men great – cherrish your own god-damned qualities!
Don’t sing. Don’t dance. Don’t go to the theatre. Don’t dress well. Don’t shop. Don’t get your hair done and your nails manicured. Don’t go tanning and bleach your teeth. Don’t talk about your emotions. And don’t, DON’T go in drag for Halloween. These things are reserved for the ten percent club, so back off and give us back our Details Magazine, damnit!