Saw a hot guy playing pool. He took his shirt off halfway through the night, and everybody suddenly became HUGE pool fans – myself included. Not sure why one takes their shirt off playing pool – it’s not like you should be breaking a sweat. At the end of the night we concluded he must be straight and just liked all the attention. Okay, so I didn’t even make eye-contact, and the straight theory is my story and I’m sticking to it.
Not like I really want to pick up a guy in a bar anyway. Though I was tempted. I used to go to the Saloon several times a week. Oftentimes it involved bringing somebody home for the night. It’s a lot different sober. You see the folks who are behaving like you used to. You see the normies who don’t have a problem. And then you see the folks that you knew from the rooms that are back at the bar.
It’s really sad. I counted five people last night I knew from AA who were out drinking. I guess it’s really an eye-opener for me as to how difficult a struggle this whole sobriety thing really can be for some people. I didn’t really have an urge to drink last night, but it was discomforting to see these people drinking.
One friend had 8 or 9 years sober and then decided he was never an alcoholic to begin with. Another friend had 3 and half years sober and decided yesterday he was going to do a shot, have a few bears, and then hop right back on the bandwagon.
It makes me sad. In my meeting last night we read a story in which the author talks about the two aspects of alcoholism – The allergy of the body, and the obsession of the mind. The latter is clearly the more dangerous of the two. An allergy you can do something about – avoid whatever you’re allergic to. The obsession of the mind is what leads us down dangerous paths, makes bad decisions, and does unhealthy things.
The obsession will eventually lead to a complete change in a person if they continue drinking. They will no longer be themselves. Their whole being will become an addict and revolve around that addiction. Everything else is secondary. Eventually they will lose everything, and it’s in the process of losing everything that you feel bad for them. Having to watch it over time, just waiting for the person to hit their bottom, is not pleasant. They will blame everything but themselves as to why they lose this or that. They’re living in a delusion of an okay life, until it hits them one day that they are spent. They find themselves empty, with nobody and nothing, to reach out for.
Have a happy 4th of July and be grateful of the gifts you’ve been given.