Comments on: Is it worth it?

By: Leah

Leah — Wed, 28 Jun 2006 02:38:11 +0000

Not sure how I got to your site…but great post!

By: jr

jr — Tue, 27 Jun 2006 22:45:39 +0000

please update soon

By: gayboydiary

gayboydiary — Fri, 26 May 2006 15:35:31 +0000

Having been in a couple of serious relationships that ended painful I can understand what you mean about being scared of them. I’ve had some of the best times of my life whilst in a relationship but at the same time I don’t think I have experienced pain so intense as that of a relationship ending.

I am single at the moment and every time I meet some one I think “is this person going to worth the pain once the relationship ends?” and there is not simple answer. One should always be optimistic and embark on a relationship without thinking about the end but being a cynic/experienced it’s really difficult not to do that.

Would I get in a relationship right now? absolutely but maybe that’s because I am a relationship kind of guy, I like the companionship. I can continue living and enjoying my life as a single person and being in a relationship wouldn’t mean that I am no longer an individual but if I had a choice I would prefer to be with someone as opposed to being single.

I wonder if my attitude is that of a typical gay man. I mean the part about relationships coming to an end inevitably.

P.S. Great blog. I hope you don’t mind if I link to you on mine.

By: jon l

jon l — Sun, 21 May 2006 03:07:16 +0000

I’m not sure. One thing I have not seen in any of the comments is the fact that, as gay people, we have such a small amount of guys to pick from - and that’s not factoring in the men who are out, gay, have their shit together, are done with the sleeping around & manipulation stuff…that whittles us down to maybe 1.5% of the population. That’s not much.

I haven’t dated anyone in 10 years because the majority of gay men I’ve met are still manipulating, lying and presenting an image that is not them at all - it’s of someone they wish they were, and in my 31 years of being alive I have yet to meet a gay man who is a real, honest, breathing example of kindness, flaws included, without judging me for my own fuck-ups. I sometimes wonder if gay men are too emotionally wounded to be able to give anything to another man…I’ve been out since I was 14 and have seen quite a few examples of what men will do to each other and the aftermath has been unthinkable…seeing one becoming HIV+ and the partner just takes off…addictions occur and I’ve seen guys almost encourage the other to do drugs just to see him become addicted. We’ve got a lot of twisted people in the gay community who have a lot of work to do on themselves yet. I’m not willing to go through 1996 a second time. That is what sent me over the edge…and I guess the fact that I haven’t met anyone since has to do with self-protection and staying away from the kinds of guys who want to drag you down with them. Unfortunately, there’s way too many within the gay community, and since we have basically nothing to pick from, where are the healthy guys (who we haven’t already met before?)…

By: DP

DP — Mon, 01 May 2006 18:16:44 +0000

I believe it is worth it…for me it IS one of the ways I express love for myself - to understand and accept unconditional love.

By: Colin

Colin — Mon, 01 May 2006 04:42:01 +0000

Hey Sparkles, where’ve you been? We miss you

By: Grant

Grant — Thu, 27 Apr 2006 21:22:58 +0000

I can not believe you are still whinning about relationships. Maybe you need to move. Try Portland, there are lots f hotties here.

By: callen

callen — Thu, 27 Apr 2006 15:10:18 +0000

i think i used to know you. you might have dated one of my roommates… jason or logan. i’m not sure. anyway, nice to see u again.

By: phoenix

phoenix — Fri, 21 Apr 2006 07:51:25 +0000

i’ve been wondering for a while now why we are born with this apparennt urge to find a partner. are we not allowed to be happy alone? apparently not, because everyone tries to set me up…oh well. i’m fine alone, and as for now, i have no problems w/ that.

keep on truckin’ man

By: Earl

Earl — Thu, 20 Apr 2006 19:35:31 +0000

Is it worth it? What a loaded question. My response: Absolutely and without a doubt.

Anyone who’s truly been in love would have to agree. Well, I would hope so.

It’s like the old addage, “Why do I keep hitting myself with a hammer? Because it feels SO good when I stop!”

I’m a hopeless romantic. I’ll be the first to admit that. But, as long as love isn’t abused like a drug, it can be incredibly healing and fulfilling.

Oversimplified? Perhaps.

But it helps me sleep at night.